Dr. Strangebama or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bailouts

OK...So if you believe the people in power (and discount the Keynesian non-believers) the New Deal was the savior of the Great Depression. And we obviously cannot trust (what I have been told) the mythical, unicorn and leprechaun laden "Free Market." And obviously politicians are much, much smarter than the mere mortals that reside outside the I-495 Beltway. So I have decided we should just bag this whole capitalist, freedom, liberty mumbo jumbo and let the government run everything. Obviously, Wall Street can't be trusted , nor can the accounting houses, energy producers, peanut companies, banks, real estate brokerages, auto companies, etc. We all need to blame the "evil doers" in this country and beyond, and cannot take any personal responsibility for our own actions, because we are perfect and any missteps we make were obviously due to some other evil-doer's evil deeds.

So let's stop pretending that Jefferson, Emerson, Franklin, Madison, Thoreau, and Washington were all great men, and call them out for what they really were...Wide-eyed, antiquated, idealist quacks that were completely devoid of reality and preferred to live in their own private, idyllic fantasylands. If this government intervention is so necessary, so important, and our politicians are acting out of pure paternal concern for the health and vitality of the country, let's just dump this whole idea of capitalistic free markets, liberty, and bring the Federal Government up to date into the "realities" of today. After all, the politicos are doing all of this just to promote the General Welfare, right? Thank you Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi! I always believed in you!!!

We can't trust other countries, so let's invade them. We can't trust our own business owners, so let's subsidize them and force them to do "the people's" work. We can't trust American Citizens, so lets have the NSA monitor all their communications. Let's just have the government run everything and that way we don't have to worry about anything other than doing what we're told. After all, it seemed to have work for thousands and thousands of years in Europe, with all those happy peasants and feudal surfs working for the monarchy! Who are we to think we should be any different? Paul Krugman is right (I mean, they did give him a Nobel Prize, and it's not like they just hand those out to charlatans or sponsors of terrorism or anything) nationalization is now as American as Apple Pie. So I think we let the Political Masters run the show and we will just follow their lead. At least we will all be employed, right?